Dating violence true stores of hurt and hope
Once the counselor establishes what the client views as abuse, the counselor can begin to challenge those beliefs, Ballantyne says. For example, he says, ask the client how his or her personal definition of a healthy relationship is working out. [Say], ‘It’s OK for us to think differently about this, but let’s talk a little bit more about it.’ Anytime you can [give] the control back to the client, I think that’s when changes tend to stick a little more.” Self-perception and society’s perception Clients who have a history with domestic violence can present with myriad related issues, Crowe says.
But a lack of recognition is not the only thing that keeps clients from bringing up a history of abuse with counselors, Murray says.
Others fear being judged or are otherwise unsure of how a counselor might react to their revelation.
And some clients try to keep the truth hidden for safety reasons, Murray says, having been threatened with further harm by their perpetrators should they ever tell anyone.
Many victims and survivors feel a sense of shame or embarrassment about these experiences.
Some even feel they are somehow to blame for being the target of abuse.