100 dating affairs
Some statistics say that roughly 50 percent of married men will cheat, and at least 81 percent won't admit to it even after a woman asks that searing question.It was watching these statistics play out in his practice that prompted family counselor, rabbi and best-selling author Gary Neuman to embark on a two-year study of 100 men who had sexual affairs and 100 men who were faithful.Google the words "marriage and affair" and you get more than 17 million variations on how to heal.That's because "fidelity in marriage"—which only gets about 3½ million hits—is a hard thing to come by these days.[In the home,] for example, if the husband makes breakfast and burns it, he still feels like he made a gesture. See all of the in these slideshows How should a wife address this? I don't want to wait until the kids are in college.But if those sorts of gestures are met with what he did wrong instead of what he tried to do right, then that becomes, "I can't win." What sort of behavior will a man exhibit if this leads him to start thinking of cheating? When you see these things happening bring it up in a positive way. I want to have some fun." This is all about empowering women.Was there something they could do to prevent this and create a mutually beneficial relationship?When I was on [the] "Oprah" show, I talked about 9/11 firefighters who had helped the wives of their fallen comrades and ended up having affairs with them. I think most people ascribe to the theory that men cheat for sex.
This relationship between "appreciation" and a man's need to "win"—how does that play out in the home? You would imagine from the way he's yelling that he has part ownership in the team he's cheering for.I've been a marriage counselor for more than 20 years now.I think [hearing] women who have had the overwhelming pain of being cheated on and the subsequent disaster for the kids definitely made me want to find out what they could do other than be victims.He shared his findings in the new book, "The Truth About Cheating: Why Men Stray and What You Can Do To Prevent It." Neuman spoke to NEWSWEEK's Jessica Ramirez.Excerpts: NEWSWEEK: I think a woman ' s first instinct when seeing the cover of your book is, " Why do I have to prevent this? " Gary Neuman: There is clearly no blame on the woman if he's cheated. However, the fact that you're not responsible does not mean that you don't want to take an active role in your relationship to bring out the best in your husband, as he should for you.